June 27, 2014

summer/dogs/house/harbor

oh, summer!  it's picking up, it's picking up so fast now that we've hit the solstice, it's a concert here and a pool there and this weekend i'm going to boone and next weekend is the 4th (hooray america!) and the next weekend i'll be in miami and the NEXT weekend the rugby team is playing a tournament in asheville and you bet your boots i will be there for that.

last night there was an impromptu cookout at brian and emerald's - they are the best hosts and they really seem to love doing it - but it'll be the last one for a while since somebody's grandfather is moving in with them, plus it was a goodbye party for chuck and rhey.  murphy showed up, and someone suggested we go get his dog and i needed NO encouraging, his dog is the coolest little slobber muffin boxer badass.  there were kabobs and garlic bread and salad and cookies and strawberitas and good company and dogs, and i was happy happy happy.  we caught fireflies in our hands.

when i move - i can do that kind of thing.  i don't have a grill, but i'll have a yard big enough for people to come over, and maybe just enough space in the living room for ten or twelve people to hang out, and (hopefully) a dog of my own.  my bitty house will have get togethers, like a real adult.

i read a list of baby names someone had made, and one of the suggestions was harbor.  i love it.  i love it so much.  it's a strong name, a safe place, unusual without being strange, and it comes with sailing imagery.  works for a boy or a girl.  i don't like the idea of lifting something like that, i wish i'd come up with it myself, but it's such a good name.  so good.

everything is so good.

June 26, 2014

a picture to sum up this year, my twenties, my whole life?  hurrah!

June 24, 2014

cat's cradle

bombadil last saturday - they played my favorite favorite song by them, cold runway, the first time i've heard it live, even though i've seen them what, five times?  losing count now.  it's so funny to see these guys standing up there, i've been to their house, i saw a movie with a couple of them, daniel goofball danced with me, stuart and i visited the lemur place in durham.  and then they're the main act at cat's cradle - macklemore played here last year, neutral milk hotel played recently, death cab has played in the past - it's not entirely a small town stage.  and they're so good!  and so fun!  i haven't been to very many concerts recently, and i need to change that.  getting caught up in the music and the crowd and the lights and the energy is one of the closest things to magic i experience.

June 19, 2014

florida

just booked flights with dahlia to go to MIAMI.  lotta people complain about florida - i am NOT one of them.  maybe i've been lucky but i managed to avoid this tacky, trashy, pink flamingoed florida everyone hates and fell straight in love with the water, bluer and clearer than anything we've got in nc, the food, the bright colors colors, even the heat (mostly).  these pictures are from the last couple of times i went.  i doubt we'll go to jungle island or sailing this time, but i do plan to spend a GOOD amount of time on the beach.  and eating.  and staying up late and dizzy on the streets of coconut grove.

flash


from age nine until last august, i had this fantastic cat.  he was a big orange tabby, king of the playground, my nightly snuggle buddy, always up for a belly rub.  he loved me best and i loved him best back.  part of me thought he would live forever because he just had to - what would i do without him?  but then he had to start taking medicine every day, then twice a day, then the medicine stopped working and i had to give him shots, and those weren't working, and finally he stopped eating and after i found him asleep in the litterbox twice i had to just say okay.  it was awful.  it was one of the hardest things i've been through, and everyone who had met marley understood that.  he was the best cat ever.

i started walking to work when i moved to my current house, and one of the houses i pass daily has two cats.  at first i preferred the black and white one, he was friendlier and would run up if you called to him.  the other cat wouldn't leave the porch, and when i tried to get closer he would run away.  i'm a sucker for orange cats though, so i eventually befriended him too, using dangly earbuds as cat toy bribery.  we bonded, and now he comes running when he hears my bike pull up (the other cat is jealous and bitter and ignores me now).  he's sturdy like marley, not one of those floppy flimsy cats, and he does the same headbutt thing when he likes a person.  he's not the best cat ever, couldn't be, but he is helping to fill the cat-shaped hole in my life. 

June 17, 2014

good/fun/short

overtime is great, but working graduation saturday morning made my weekend feel so. short.  the boy and i had a quiet friday - not even half a contra for me and then GoT while he played skyrim (time out for a sec - game of thrones is SO GOOD.  i am totally a bandwagon fan, but i'm reading the first book before i watch any of the series, and i already know a million spoilers, but LAWD i am into it.  it is a heck of a commitment, and i can't breeze through it like i can other long books - i'm looking at you, harry potter - but when i'm not reading it i want to be reading it and i love the character-by-character chapter format and everyone is just so well detailed and interesting and you either hate them or they're way cool or you can't decide which but it's definitely one of the two and that's my plug for the book, if you are also about 2/3s of the way through the first book and would like to discuss BY ALL MEANS let me know cause whoa).

ANYWAY, saturday i got up early early to help with graduation, 75% of the time i had a baby in my arms and she was the most darling, sweetest lil baby i ever did meet with the most ridiculously pink outfit ever.  then sarah and i met up for grossly bright pedicures and then we went to nordstrom rack and bought matching maxi dresses (heyo!).  theeeen to brian and emerald's for a cookout, and we got there at the same exact time as the boy, and then wade showed up with his lady friend and she was a huge hit with me and sarah - loves harry potter and tracy chapman, has a dog, etc.  there can be this weird kind of competition between the rugby girlfriends sometimes (maybe it's all in my head, it's just a vibe i get) but she was so laid back and fun to talk to.

the boy and i did our usual bars saturday, brunch sunday deal, and we actually stayed in bed long enough to get real brunch at milltown, which was yum, obviously.  i took the looooongest nap - 4 1/2 hours! - and then moved some boxes and met up with ryan for 22 jump street.  somehow that same tired bromance story line is done really well, and channing tatum and jonah hill play off of each other perfectly, and the soundtrack was on point.

good weekend, fun weekend, too short weekend.  from here on out it's going to be packing moving packing moving all. da. time.  which sucks but it's also exciting and whatnot.  i'll make sure there's time for fun in there too.

June 13, 2014

veggie

people wrongly associate being vegetarian with being healthy.  i am one and not the other.  my vegetarianism stems from a queasiness towards dead stuff, not any attempt at doing my body good.  and lately, i've been more inspired to do my body good.

today is not the day to start, maybe this evening, but not now because i'm halfway through a caprese sandwich (holy yum).  i read a blog post this morning about sugar, and how it's in everything, even stuff it doesn't need to be in, and how juice is no better for you than soda (still trying to wrap my head around that one.  but doesn't the kind of sugar matter?  what about the carbonation and osteoporosis?  does that mean that diet sodas are better for you than juice?  no way.) which is a bummer and a half because i love juice buuuut i also have a massive sweet tooth so there's probably a reason for that.

so i'm running and dancing and wheelthrowing (totes a workout, shut up) and all that stuff is good and grand but i can't expect to live to 104 just off of exercise - especially if i'm not feeding my body the nutrients that'll allow me to continue to exercise.

always always about moving, but when i do, i think it'll be easier to make lifestyle changes.  i'll go into overdrive then - everything in the fridge and cupboards will be mine so i won't let veggies go bad as often, and i can stock it with exactly what i want, no temptations.  and i want to replace papertowels with cloths as much as i can, and shift to healthier cleaning products, and start composting (i just ordered the cutest compost bucket), and chuck the microwave.  all kinds of things!  all kinds of save the earth hippie things!

when i was a little kid, i was the weirdo who would pick up trash off the playground during recess.  my bff and i had a nature club that mostly consisted of trying to fix broken branches with string and pasty concoctions of leaves and flowers.  and there was the vegetarian declaration.  i liked that little kid.  she had a purpose, she was driven and deliberate and caring.  and i want to be more like her again, more like that flower child environmentalist.  i want to be better for me and better for the world and better so that my future kids will be healthy little hippie children too.

June 12, 2014

loose

thursdays tend to be meh.  there's this lull in the work week where you've done most stuff and there's always friday to finish things off.  it's not a ballet night or a bachelor night or a pottery night or usually a date night (thanks rugby).  i don't even know what i do most thursdays.  tonight is actually gonna be a rare date night - a late night date night post rugby at sup dogs (cannot express how excited i am that practically their entire menu can be made vegetarian, thank you hippie town, usa) but we still both have work tomorrow.  my life is all about evening activities and weekends, and thursdays just don't do much for me.

speaking of pottery, last night i made a bad vase thing and then talked to the teacher about why it was bad and how i could make it not bad and she taught me how to find the center after centering and before opening, finding that perfect little divet right in the middle with the tip of my thumb, and all of a sudden it got way easier to carefully carefully pull things up without wonkiness or wibbling.  and now i have two bowls, big enough for macaroni.  one for me and one for you.  mac and cheese for two, we'll split the box.

after the boy convinced me that yes actually i could get rid of all my old bank statements (gulp) on account of the internet and the 21st century and whatnot, i went through boxes and bags and pulled all of statements and paid utility bills and even those little slips you get when you deposit a check out and put them in a pile to bring to work and shred.  it's scary but it feels good, phoenixy, to shed all that stuff.  i kept student loan things and tax things and yes even that warning a police officer gave me because my taillight was out, but i threw away way more than i kept.  way more.  and that's one thing, and that's great, but i still haven't been able to throw away programs of plays i've been to.  cards people have sent me.  do you need to know every movie i've been to ever?  unless the ink has since rubbed off, i can produce tickets for pretty much every time i've been to the theater since i figured out i could preserve my life by tucking things into boxes.  it's a self-preservation thing, like he says in love actually.  most people would tell me to just chuck that stuff, but each slip of paper, each handwritten "love, XXX," brings me back somewhere.  reminds me of someone.  like many people, i tend to hold onto things in the past, soak in my own nostalgia, but maybe less like a lot of these people, i have tangible reminders of almost everything.  it was only recently i stopped holding on to receipts.  and i'm not sure if that's a bad thing or not.  i don't know if these - these physical representations of memories - are things i'm okay with shedding or if i want to continue collecting loose scrapbook materials to hold onto and remember closely.

June 11, 2014

jack

sometimes this guy is the snuggliest little lovebug there ever was and sometimes i want to permanently shut him in a box.  he tried to go after a great dane the other day, idiot, it could swallow him in one go, and now my legs have a thin stripe of leashburn across the back and it burns when i sweat or swim or shower.  luna isn't any better, last night she was deadset on going through the building - i don't know if it was the storm or what, but she was heading north all else be damned - and she's their alarm system whenever another dog is in eyesight.  they can be severely not fun to walk.

but when i come in the door and luna bounds up and gives me a big adoring look and jumps up to gently rest her paws on my knees and maybe give me a kiss and jack wakes up all cuddly and sleepy-eyed and moves in closer when i sit next to him, that's when i love those puppies.  and when they fall asleep on their sides with their backs pressed up against each other?  heart bubbles to kalamazoo.  they make me nuts sometimes, but they're always worth it.

June 10, 2014

sometimes slow is the best speed

June 9, 2014

moving

 http://adriaanlouw.co.za/houses/ 

big dreams about my new space and new life.  dreams about a dog, dreams about organization, dreams about cozy and happy and mine.  dreams about what i'll cook in that kitchen.  or why i'll laugh until i cry on the living room floor.  dreams about what dreams i'll have in the bedroom.

the apartment i moved to after graduating college was - nice.  it was a very typical post-college apartment, and i liked it, and it was on a bus route, and there was more than enough space for me.  but i remember laying in the middle of the living room floor before i had anything of mine in it and crying because it didn't feel like home.  after 18 months, i was not sad to leave.

the house i'm in now, i love.  i love the hardwood floors and the marble countertops and the yellow walls.  and i like having roommates - i like having someone to come home and complain to, or to call if i lock myself out, and the giant mounted tv doesn't hurt anything either, but after living on my own it's been different to have roommates again.  and i'm looking forward to the freedom of solo living.

it sounds silly, but almost more than anything, i can't wait to decorate.  i was too shy and then it was too late to hang anything in our living room, so my current bedroom is bursting with things hung on the walls and tucked under the dresser and into the closet for safekeeping, but now i'll get to spread them throughout the house, and i am so excited.

i'm excited for the new things i'll bring too, things that will make this space different from any space i've lived in before.  things that are not shades of blue, things that explode with colors and patterns.  i've begun moving my things into storage, and it sucks, moving never doesn't suck, but there's an air of excitement to it as well.  my house.  my walls.  my kitchen.  my life.  a new start, a new opportunity to make something beautiful, and beautifully mine.

ps the website that the kitchen photo links to is so full of incredible spaces and faraway places and it just makes me want to swoon.

June 2, 2014

saturday



sarah and i had a playdate and we walked all the way around the lake by her new house.  it is just buzzing with wildlife: ducks (oh my goodness the baby), a heron dude, TURTLES TO THE MAX (not pictured because the only photo i took of them was of the biggest turtle i've ever seen in real life and also probably a snapper and also probably MATING ew).  it was super nice to just chill and take our time and appreciate (or be disgusted by) all the wildlife we saw.

when we got back we were like IT'S POPSICLE TIME so we ate popsicles and then when we finished we were like IT'S POOL TIME so we sunscreened up and did pool time and read david sedaris and watched this lanky little kid, maybe two or three, flirt with everybody and run away from his dad.  we pulled up chairs to the closest thing we could get to sunshine (wtf, pine trees) and this girl said hey and she turned out to be super friendly which is - not a new thing, but like, an unusual thing, you know?  for someone to just go, hey, i'm savannah, what's up.  but then it got weirdly cold and i got hungry on account of all we'd eaten that day was blueberry pancakes so then we were like MEXICAN FOOD and sarah said she knew this place called dos taquitos...

so we ate at dos taquitos!  i don't know if it counts as lunch cause it was so late but that's what we called it and it was one of the best lunches ever.  we sat at this picnic table outside and the weather was just perfect and lovely and so was the food.  we filled our bellies with cilantro rice, chips and fresh fresh salsa, plantains, a bean and queso filled chimichanga.  heavenly.  and i asked what was vegetarian and then i asked for rice and the waiter was thoughtful enough to tell me that their regular rice had chicken stock in it (PSA - chicken stock is not vegetarian.  i found out recently that not everyone knows this while chowing down on some pilaf) and i just really appreciated that kind of thoughfulness, ya know?  also their uniforms were just tshirts they'd puff painted.  and there was a train that went around the whole restaurant up near the ceiling.  and posters of frida kahlo on the wall which prompted a reading of this letter from frida to her buddy:

Leaving is not enough. You must stay gone. Train your heart like a dog. Change the locks even on the house he’s never visited. You lucky, lucky girl. You have an apartment just your size. A bathtub full of tea. A heart the size of Arizona, but not nearly so arid. Don’t wish away your cracked past, your crooked toes, your problems are papier mache puppets you made or bought because the vendor at the market was so compelling you just had to have them. You had to have him. And you did. And now you pull down the bridge between your houses, you make him call before he visits, you take a lover for granted, you take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic. Make the first bottle you consume in this place a relic. Place it on whatever altar you fashion with a knife and five cranberries. Don’t lose too much weight. Stupid girls are always trying to disappear as revenge. And you are not stupid. You loved a man with more hands than a parade of beggars, and here you stand. Heart like a four-poster bed. Heart like a canvas. Heart leaking something so strong they can smell it in the street.

which is probably the best thing to read to get over a breakup (i can't be sure though, i haven't tried it). stupid girls are always trying to disappear as revenge, and you are not stupid?  loveso thank you, dos taquitos, for delicious comida and frida kahlo's eyebrows/poetry.

that was the day.  the night was with the boy, lemon and blt pizzas, and kaitlin is home, and mikey came too, and then we ate snow cones and met up with the rugby boys, laughing dizzy up and down franklin street until i got so sleepy we took a cab home.  i don't understand how people feel any other way - summer is the best.